Q: Would it be considered “unequally yoked” for a husband to lead with fear of the unknown and fear of failure and say it is from God and it goes against the continued still small voice-Holy Spirit speaking to the wife? What about for the husband to manipulate his wife and others as a form of leadership?

A: Praying for your husband is very powerful. Submitting to your husband is also powerful. The husband is ultimately responsible and he is the one who will be judged for what goes on in the household. So that’s why the bible instructs wives to obey their husbands, calling him “Lord” aka “Ruler.”

Wives are called to submit to their husbands without fear and terror, trusting that God will speak to their husbands and restore any mistakes that he may make.

1 Peter 3:6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

Order is based on position, not on talent/intelligence. You may be smarter than your boss at work, but you still follow their instruction.

The Scriptures always give instructions in the right order. If you look at Ephesians 5 and Colossians 3, you’ll see the order of obedience:

Wives Obey Husbands, then Husbands Love Wives without Bitterness.

Children Obey Parents, then Fathers don’t Provoke wrath in your children.

Employees Obey Bosses, then Bosses pay fair and treat Equal.

The bible never demonstrates women submitting to their husbands only if their husbands are great leaders. The Scriptures demonstrate that wise women obey their husbands and help them learn to lead by being submissive (easy to lead), allowing themselves to be led and praying for them along the way. Foolish husbands are punished by God, not by their wives.

Abigail tried her best to submit to and help her husband even though he was a bonafide fool. God rewarded her when Nabal got killed and made her the wife to King David.

Sara followed Abraham even when he was making leadership mistakes, and eventually he became the father of faith.

A wise woman will submit to her husband’s leadership development in every area except violating the 10 Commandments. She will pray, obey and support her covenant husband until he becomes the king God made him to be. Then they will inherit the grace of life together.

If you have made mistakes in this area you can repent and keep his commandments, God can restore your marriage, or He can make you fruitful in other ways.

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